So I went to the Dr yesterday, had to weigh myself...116 lbs.  Ugh I hate that number SO much.  And I had to eat today...I really need to figure something out, I need to drop those 6 lbs.  Anyway I wont even bother posting what I ate today and depress myself even more then I already am at the moment.  Cleaned my room today, thats a plus, I cant believe its so clean right now...I really have to keep it like this from now on.  I also went out and bought a Ball Python on a whim.  Gotta get him a few more things, but I cleaned and disinfected the old tank I have and now hes all settled in.  For just eating today he is really active, but I think its just him being in a new area, and its night so hes going to be.  I named him Niko...if I can get my camera to work I'll post some pics of him later. 

I miss L so fucking much its not even funny.  Am I ever going to get over him?  Even though I really like this new guy...K.  When Im with or talking to K I dont think about L...but I do every other time...stupid songs remind me of him and just...everything.  I hate that hes everywhere and not even here.  I still hold my breath when I check my email, just hoping that I do and dont have something from him.  I have old pics on my phone of him...and a screen shot where when i had it set so i could see a preview of the text...and all he said was I love you.  So I kept it...i look at that a lot, cause i love him still so much it hurts.  That new Carrie Underwood song, Good Girl, yea the part where she says forever dont mean much.  So true.  He said forever to me, and look where I am now.  Missing him.  I hate that I dont even know if hes deploying in August or not, Im gonna be such a wreck then.  Well does me no good thinking about it now does it.

Hope your all doing great!