Friday, November 25, 2011

Back on Track

Ok.  So these past 2 weeks my grandma's been visiting, and I've had to eat.  Last night my dad actually asked me why I dont eat.  Yea last night was Thanksgiving.  And I ate.  Like a pig.  I wanted to purge, so bad, I even told my boyfriend and he was like please don't do that.  So I didn't.  I've never purged though, I'm kinda scared to.  Ugh I can't believe myself.  I'm gonna weigh myself tomorrow, I'm so scared if I'm anything above 115 pounds I might cry.  Like really.  I have to lose this weight.  I have to get to 105 pounds.  Then 100 pounds.  And then I'll be happy.  I swear I'll be happy, I have to be.  But I'm never gonna get there if I don't get my control back.  I can't believe I've been eating like that!  No more!  I'm not giving in.  I can't give in.  I will get back on track and I will lose this weight.  I will reach my goals.   
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4 comments:

  1. ibizaqueenNovember 26, 2011 at 7:17 AM

    Thank you so much that I've found you. That I see I'm not the only one. I'm starting now again, and I'm new here. But when I read your posts, I just want to say that I have the same problems and I know how do you feel.

    Purging is like drugs. You start and you think you won't do it forever. And believe me that good if you're scared of it. Never start. You will always think that you're stinking. That you're dirty. And it doesn't give satisfaction at all. Well.

    Just start again. Not tomorrow - today.

    Kisses from new follower. <3

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  2. Brown Eyed CowgirlNovember 26, 2011 at 10:23 PM

    Don't purge darling, you'll be ok. The holidays are hard for everyone. Just take a deep breath and start fresh with a new day.

    ReplyDelete
  3. SarahNovember 27, 2011 at 11:29 PM

    Yeah, you don't want to get into purging. I did, and it really is very gross. Plus, you don't get rid of around half the calories anyway. You're better off just exercising (much less disgusting).
    I'm loving your motivation! I totally think you can do what you want to do. <3

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  4. ibizaqueenNovember 28, 2011 at 5:40 AM

    Sarah is right. The biggest failure in purging is fact that you think through the next part of the day, that you smell with your vomit.
    But on the other hand, sometimes it helps. You must feel totally gross to get up. To feel beautiful after that.

    ReplyDelete

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