A big change is coming

I wanted you lovelies to be the first to know. I'm gonna tell my dad about my eating disorder tonight. And possibly giving my two weeks at my awful job. And well I'll see how it goes. I'm still going to be here and supporting all of you, because you have all gotten me through so much, speaking of which I have more to this post later. But just letting you know I wont be disappearing. I just need to do something. I can't keep holding back the years at work and home. Ah breaks over. I'll finish this later tonight!

UPDATE

Ok.  So I didnt do it yet.  And heres why.  Last night my sister came home around 12:20am her and her boyfriend had been at his house trying to get his stuff done for school on the computer and my mom had called and she told her this.  Well she walks in and my dad like flipped.  I guess its cause he had been drinking but I dont know.  He was like Im sick of you being out all night every night and not being with your son and all this stuff.  She said she was leaving and he said if she did then dont come back.  Among other things.  Long story short she went in to bed with the baby and her boyfriend and left before he woke up this morning.  I told him last night when he said sorry to me that im not the one he should be saying it to and he said he didnt have to say it to her, that she needed to hear it from someone.  He went way overboard though.  And i said we all used to be happy and now we're not.  and that I wasnt going to ruin Christmas with telling him how I feel.  I came home and saw my nephew and hes just going to be so excited on Christmas day.  WIth his new Rock and Roll Mickey.  I cant ruin this for everyone yet.  So Im going to wait.  But I have made the choice to tell them, and I will.  That and he was sleeping when I got home and he woke up in a crappy mood anyways. 

I'm scared though.  Like telling them terrifies me.  It's been my secret for so long and now I'm just letting go of it.  I dont know who I am anymore, what I want, where I want to be.  Suddenly I'm going to have to make choices.  I don't want to be in dental, or even in the medical field.  My dad said I should look into cosmetology like my sister.  I had already been thinking about it to be honest.  More independent, away from the boss, and my own work, my own clients.  I dont want to stay in New Jersey anymore either.  I want to go somewhere warm.  If my aunt hadn't fallen and hurt her back I would say Texas.  But well by time I get this all figured out, she'll be better and I could probably stay with her for a bit.  Just a lot to think about, and I don't know how to make it happen :-/

Thank you all so much for the support.  Its gonna be you guys that gets me through this and gives me the courage to tell my parents.  Your all amazing!! <333